i dont miss you

if you asked me if i missed you

i would say no

because missing you means 

more than admitting you left 

it means that the thought of you

leaves my throat dry

and my stomach hollow

this gaping pain in my chest never ceases

like the way you flit in my mind


and i cannot say that i miss you

because that would mean that

i let you into my soul

gave you a place in my life 

that you so rudely ran from

it would be saying that you once made me

smile more than i thought i could

laugh more than i thought i could

hurt more than i thought i would

cry more than i knew i would


and i will not say that i miss you 

because those words mean 

that you took a piece of my heart

without asking 

like the way you left me alone

the memory of us only remaining

as if there was nothing to miss 

an empty promise of love

that you so carelessly broke


so i do not miss you 

because that would mean that 

i loved you 

and still do


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